Do Men want to get Married, or do they just give in to “pressure”?

The other day, a female friend asked me if men ever want to get married, or if they do it out of pressure from their families, girlfriends and Society.

She rattled off some answers women typically accept from boyfriends as to why they’re “not ready to Married just yet”, which was anything from her guy not feeling solidified enough in his Career, his still being in Graduate School, just not feeling ready to settle down with one woman, to his wanting a bigger Savings account before taking the next step with her.

As far as whether men want to settle down with one woman or not…yes, I’ll admit men are Hunters/Fisherman. And sometimes they seem to constantly be hunting or fishing. Some women think men may have an insatiable desire to “spread their seed”.

But frankly, I wholeheartedly believe men and women both want to get married.

Like a Fisherman who can only take home one fish per day, men will continue to fish and consider their options until they believe they have caught the best fish in the sea. This doesn’t mean they’re holding out for someone “perfect” – it means they’re looking to get the best fish they can possibly land, which is dependent on the man’s looks, social status and intelligence.

As far as men’s delaying tactics go, Bottom line….If you’ve been in your relationship for more than a year and your boyfriend still says he doesn’t want to get married, this isn’t a good sign.

What it means is he probably doesn’t want to marry you. It’s likely all of his excuses (job, money, etc.) are just his way of delaying the inevitable.

I hate to use an overdone phrase, but if he doesn’t express his desire to marry you, he’s probably just not that into you. Remember this doesn’t mean there’s anything “wrong” with you – he just doesn’t think the two of you are compatible for a Forever Commitment

He doesn’t mind the delay because men don’t subscribe to many of the physical and hormonal urgencies which motivate some women, so men don’t mind sticking around while you’re unknowingly his “Good for Now Girl”. Especially because he certainly likes you.  Plus he gets companionship and sex.

Once you get sick of waiting for him to pop the question, he’ll move on to someone else who may or may not be The One.  But you should definitely stop waiting around — at least you won’t be wasting your time, and this frees you up for the Right Guy for you.

Don’t let a the wrong guy make you think all men want their lives to be perfectly set before they’re ready for marriage, or that men aren’t interested in making a lifetime commitment.  Men will make a commitment to the right girl almost no matter what.

Just like the quote from When Harry Met Sally, “When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.”

So yes, men absolutely want to get married, raise children and have a family.  Definitely.

—————————————————-

The author, Steve, is a 40 year old successful Entrepreneur who lives in the northeast with his wife of seven years and two beautiful children.  Steve is an amateur Triathlete who also believes he has a fantastic sense of humor, although this last part is still up for public debate.